Pre Mid-life Crisis?
I have been having thoughts about life being meaningless constantly these past few weeks.
Bored, tired and fed up. I definitely know what I don’t want, but when you ask me ‘What is it then do you want?’. Answer: I have no freaking idea myself.
4 hours of sleep at night for 4 days in a row. I know many people probably do that during uni, but honestly, I hate it.
I have a C++ project presentation later in the morning. The information dialog is screwed up even though there doesn’t seem to be any error in it.
I want to do something ‘radical’ after it. Top on my list: Get two tortoises from MK. Next would probably be getting on a random bus. Or sitting inside the mtr back and forth while reading. Getting an air ticket and flying back to Malaysia (or to Taiwan since it’s so near) impromptu. Maybe take a ferry over to Macau. How about spending the night wandering around Mongkok aimlessly and then ‘hike’ back to Pokfulam. I don’t know.
But I have a feeling that I’d just lie in bed, and stare at the ceiling all day till the sun goes down. What joy. I don’t even have the creative to come up with something to do that would bring me remotely any thrill.
Lol. If any of my relatives see this, I would be expecting another very concerned MSN conversation bombardment from them. So, a note to them – I won’t do anything stupid. Do not worry. I am still able to think perfectly straight. Life just seems purposeless at the moment. That’s all.
Good morning.
February 28, 2009 at 4:59 am
i hate that part of life too.
totally purposeless n seems the only thing you can do in life is assignment.
is this ur third year, final year or what?
hope you get through the ‘crisis’ soon….
February 28, 2009 at 5:24 pm
It’s not really just the assignments part really. I think it has something more to do with my life going a certain direction and having a generally same ending as everyone else.
I want to do something that I really have what you call passion for. But up till now, the only thing I’m close to being passionate about is bkball, and I still have not yet thought of a way to integrate it into my life so that it’d seem more bearable.
I wonder why I didn’t explore other options before diving into a course.
I’m in my second year now. Sigh.
March 8, 2009 at 5:21 am
Do your graffitiiii drawings! I’m not sure if you enjoy them, but I sure think you have the talent, even like how you choose your attires and color matching and stuffs..
Sometimes life’s just plain boring without radical things, I missed some of the times when I just lie to my parents and I go cc and go chi chong kai and malls and go movie marathon all by myself, and even the times that i purposely dun wanna go home and just stay in my uni’s library to draw (while everyone else is studying and reading thick books), and sit in the middle of my uni’s corridor or some plaza just to draw the scenery from that angle.
I need some of these breaks too, but sometimes things are not as simple, as if something is always there to stop you from doing this and that. But sometimes I guess i’m only giving excuses to myself.
On a side note, maybe visiting blogs or websites would enlighten or inspire, i guess it helped me during some of these times too. but i guess sometimes we would just rant and we’ll find a way out eventually..
*hugs puumba*